Memories That Sting

I was stung by a bee once in my life. It was a horrible experience. The burning feeling lingers for a while. It is recommended that you remove the stinger quickly to minimize the amount of venom that is released into the body. Last Sunday yet again I was asking God to help me to forgive. I don't know about you but whenever a sermon on forgiveness is taught certain people come to mind. I pray tearfully to God to help me forgive. Unforgiveness has a way of leaving you in state of paralysis that is hard to overcome. You can't pretend it away, you can't speak it away honestly I don't even think you can take pragmatic steps to wiping it clean. It's a work of the Holy Spirit. That being said, in my prayer I heard God speak quietly to me that He was removing the stingers. In essence the memories will remain but the sting of those memories, He is removing. I would love to be spiritual and say how I allow God to remove stingers quickly. However, that's not always the case. I have admittedly allowed a lot of poison into my system. The poison of unforgiveness is bitterness that leads to hatred that leads to vengeance and the such. Its affects are nasty and vicious. Matthew 5:22-24

A few months back I had a conversation with one of my sisters where she explained forgiveness being like a debt owed. When you forgive your releasing the person from that debt. That was liberating for me. In my brain I saw an itemized spread sheet carefully recording the cost of each incident. Words that were spoken, actions done and undone and their cost. Some people owed me several thousand  forgiveness dollars. Others had been paying off their debt slowly and things where evening up. Then God in His love begins to show me my debt to Him. The amount owed supersedes anything I could pay back and on the cross it was all paid. It is something about seeing you own itemized debt that is sobering. It will shake you like coffee from the stupor of a self-centered hangover. I could begin visualize myself deleting the amounts owed from my spreadsheet. What's really amazing is when God begins to show you what you said and did that deeply hurt others. Matthew 18:21-35

I heard these lyrics and thought about unforgivness: 

 When the darkness fills my senses When my blindness keeps me from Your touch... Jesus come

  When my burdens keeps me doubting When my memories take the place of You... Jesus come 

Unforgivness will fill your senses to the point of blindness. You find yourself no longer being able to see yourself, people or even God rightly. If He doesn't come to you in His grace there is no hope. Unforgivness is like the heavy load that is carried around weighing on a persons shoulders. Matthew 11:28-30 Finally here we are full circle where the memories take the place of God. The memories take up more space than they should. They only do that because the stingers are still there. The pain is what drives us to prove ourselves and protect ourselves. Once the stinger associated with memory is gone the memory can take its rightful amount of space providing lessons and love. Let's allow Jesus to come and remove the stingers.